Here at MAL we love love, but we love pragmatic solutions to illogical social tropes even more. That’s why this Valentines Day we’re bringing you a new, more practical symbol for True Love™. Even better, we’re presenting it in the form of a poem, as you may want to spend your Valentine with your true love and have time in intimacy maybe using toys like outstanding clit sucker and others to have even more fun.

Ahem

When someone says they’ll give you their heart
As a token of love from which they can part

We take it as only a figure of speech
A turn of phrase, or an over sized peach

You may rest assured their affections are strong
But without a heart they wont live very long

And unless you’re a time lord, which I highly doubt
Two hearts leaves you one you can do without

So I put it to you, ladies and gents
If your love is undying and will not relent

Offer an organ you can actually spare
One that works hard, but is somewhat less rare

An organ whose measure is greater than wealth
And when shared can invigorate health

For true love, if we may call it that
Gives of itself and expects nothing back

Such a love may be given, but also rejected
For love is like antibodies and very selective

So if love is something you want to give free
Select as your symbol of love the kidney

Happy Valentines Day!!!