Elyse's Posts

Operation Flawless: A Confessional Recap

Operation Flawless: A Confessional Recap

I want to thank every single person who contributed even a single selfie. You are all amazing. You are all beautiful. And it is your faces that helped me keep going. I love and respect all of you. I know it was hard. I bow down to you. Monday was the end of Operation Flawless, a social media campaign encouraging women to reject conventional beauty standards and post “unattractive” selfies. I spent... »

Operation Flawless: Selfies against Big Beauty

Operation Flawless: Selfies against Big Beauty

In case you’ve forgotten, a couple of months ago, Erin Gloria Ryan of Jezebel wrote a ridiculous article declaring selfies to be a “cry for help” and the ultimate anti-feminist act. Our own Surly Amy responded, schooling Ryan on the importance of self-portraits throughout history. Selfies give us the power to control the way the world sees us. We show ourselves at our best. We show the world that ... »

Worst Miracle Ever

Worst Miracle Ever

Hello, world. If you’re reading this, it means I lived long enough to finish typing it. But probably I’m dead. At the hands of a cruel dare from my fellow MALabbers. They’re horrible people who disguise themselves as friends. Don’t trust them. Let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, I bought some of those stupid miracle berry tabs. They’re miracle fruit, you see, i... »

Dudes of OKCupid

Dudes of OKCupid

I wish I could add a ton of hilarious commentary. But how do I top “I’m a writing panda. I eat words like bamboo.” HOW? I can’t. What I can say is that whenever I’m like “Ugh. Marriage. How the hell have I been doing this for 10 years?” I see something like this and I’m like “OMG I LOVE MARRIAGE AND MONOGAMY AND EVERYTHING ABOUT NEVER DATING SW... »

Mad Pic Lab: QUACKS ARE HERE!

Mad Pic Lab: QUACKS ARE HERE!

HELLLLOOOOOOOOOO photo takers! IT’S MAD PIC LAB DAY! And I’m all kinds of loopy because I’m on migraine meds. I’m high as a mofo, but not in pain. Because my doctor isn’t a QUACK. Yes, it’s a terrible joke. But I don’t care BECAUSE I FEEL GREAT AND I LOVE SCIENCE BASED MEDICINE AND CAPS LOCK. So… last week, your assignment was “Quack”. An... »

Mad Pic Lab: Zombies edition

Mad Pic Lab: Zombies edition

If you hadn’t heard, the Mad Pic Lab project is back and IN ACTION, MOFOS! Last week, we re-kicked off with Zombies! Because this project died months ago and NOW IT’S BACK FOR YOUR BRAINZ! Refresher: Every Tuesday afternoon, I will post a word. You have one week to get a picture to me with that week’s theme. There are no rules except that the pic has to be your own creation. It doesn’t... »

MadPicLab Returns! LIKE A ZOMBIE!

MadPicLab Returns! LIKE A ZOMBIE!

Last spring, I launched a project called Mad Pic Lab, a photo-a-day crowd-art project, and everyone fell in love with everything about it. Today, it returns. Except it will be weekly and not daily. So, if you are new to MPL or need a refresher, here’s how it works—Every Tuesday afternoon, I will post a word. You have one week to get a picture to me with that week’s theme. There are no ... »

Happy Sloth! The most huggable vaccine song ever written!

Happy Sloth! The most huggable vaccine song ever written!

My friend Greg “Gerg” Perrine wrote a song about vaccines. I feel like he was thinking about me when he wrote this song… though I can’t prove it. But it suspiciously mentions a happy sloth, a moose and “da lady bug”… while the new Hug Me I’m Vaccinated shirts feature sloths, and Moose and Delaney Bug are my kids. Sure there’s turtles, too. BUT ... »

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