Lab Track: Kill For God

Lab Track: Kill For God

Cloe brought this little gem to our attention. The Rudy Schwartz project is a Zappa-esque, Dr. Demento-inspired outfit known for such absurdist songs as “Chick Corea’s First Ouija Board” and “The Lynyrd Skynyrd Memorial Tractor Pull.” This particular tune has lyrics that are really, really, ridiculously offensive, but are sung in an old-timey softshoe style that takes some of the edge off. Just…read the lyrics. I’m not going to say anything more than that.

Kill for God
The Rudy Schwartz Project

I wanna join Islamic jihad
I just want to kill for god
Praising Allah is the life for me
I’ll use pipe bombs, what the fuck
Killing Hebrews brings good luck
Gotta make Homene proud of me

Load a car with dynamite and drive it to a synagogue without any brakes
Nothing could be better than impaling your intestines on a big rusty stake

Hand grenades and cattle prods
Let’s go out and kill for god
I can hear Mohammed calling me

Though the Koran seems quite odd
I still want to kill for god
Praising Jesus is the life for me
Fuck those pagans, they’re such cynics
Let’s bomb the abortion clinic
Jerry Falwell is my cup of tea

Never thought I’d make it big by selling God to idiots on cable TV
What the fuck, it’s not GE, but still, what better way to use my business degree

Use a rifle, spare the rod
Let’s go out and kill for god
Praise the lord and hand that gun to me

This has been another installment of Monday Lab Tracks. Send us your musical recommendations through our contact link at the top of the page, and tell us what you think of the song in the comments below!

Ashley Hamer (aka Smashley) lives in Chicago where she plays jazz saxophone, writes stuff, and does a lot of skeptickin'. She is currently recovering from being raised in the wooiest city in California and then living in Megachurch Texas, USA. Her tenor saxophone's name is Ladybird.
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